NEWZ: The United States Goes Insane!
May. 7th, 2004 05:12 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
shannon_a(OK, some would argue it was a short walk.)
Krispy Kreme Sales Are Down!
10% reduction in sales forecast = 25% drop in stock. (= a good time to buy)
Cattle Rustling is Back!
That's right. What commodity is more valuable than gold ... ?
Meat Prices Are Up!
Beef up 20%, pork 30%, and cheese 40%. Yes, clearly Americans are eating healthier.
The reason for all this stupidity? You guessed it, the Atkins Diet. People are as serious as a heart attack about this diet. After all, it was only discredited once in the 1990s.
Krispy Kreme Sales Are Down!
10% reduction in sales forecast = 25% drop in stock. (= a good time to buy)
Cattle Rustling is Back!
That's right. What commodity is more valuable than gold ... ?
Meat Prices Are Up!
Beef up 20%, pork 30%, and cheese 40%. Yes, clearly Americans are eating healthier.
The reason for all this stupidity? You guessed it, the Atkins Diet. People are as serious as a heart attack about this diet. After all, it was only discredited once in the 1990s.
